Category: random idiocy
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Barb Karpowla
Brittney: “Do you know Barb Karpowla?” Me: “Who? I don’t think I’ve met her.” Brittney [funny look]: “Barb, your wife. Do you carpool?” Me: “Oh. Yeah. Uh, I thought you were asking about somebody named Barb Karpowla.” Brittney [laughing]: “I thought you were making fun of me!” Read.
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crumbs
I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed this, but you have to keep your head upright while you’re chewing or food. If you duck your head, or bend over to take the dishes out of the wash machine, bits of food will come out your nose. Or is that just me? Read.
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cardboard
The coffee that comes with the complimentary breakfast at hotels always tastes like boiled cardboard, even when it’s not served in a paper cup. It must have taken years of devoted study to learn how to do that. Read.
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obligatory cold weather reference
How bout this cold weather, hey? Car start all right this morning then? Whoo, I might need a jump! Kay, I got to go, keep warm! Read.
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chills
Yeah, so … it’s gonna get a little cold. Not sure if that’s tonight, or tomorrow, or when hell freezes over. “Future” is a little vague, don’t you think? Read.
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upper body
Tom Bowman reports for NPR that the Marine Corps will delay enforcing the 3-pullup requirement for female recruits, prompting crotchety old coot and misogynistic retired army colonel Robert Maginnis to say the delay shows that women just can’t meet the same standards. “Young women, in spite of all the training and all the best intentions,… Read.
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tongue
So that you might feel, I don’t know, unclean for the rest of the day, here is a 24-inch long disembodied tongue licking a snail: Or, it could be a Florida Horse Conch. You decide. Read.
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funhouse
Yet more proof that you can’t believe everything you see: “The flashed face distortion effect is an optical illusion involving the fast-paced presentation of eye-aligned faces. Faces appear grotesquely transformed whilst one focuses on the cross midway between them. As with many scientific discoveries, the phenomenon was first observed serendipitously … The phenomenon … also… Read.
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spontaneously generated boo
Recipe for cats: When folding clothes fresh from the dryer, stack them on the table. Within the hour, cats will begin to appear. Read.
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dinosaurs!wtf?
This is the blog my oldest son would’ve written if there had only been such a thing as blogs back around 1989 or so: Nanotyrannus was only about a third of the size of the biggest tyrannosaurs, which you might think would preclude it from this list [of the 5 most awful Tyrannosaurs]. The problem… Read.
This Is Drivel 