Category: random idiocy
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osmosis
The song stuck in my head this morning was Abba’s “Take A Chance On Me,” a song I’m not particularly fond of but nevertheless know all the words to. I know all the words to a lot of Abba songs, which is kind of odd because I never turned the radio up when I heard Read.
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addicted to meals
It’s not that they said something cold-hearted, like, “It’s a cost-saving measure. If we cut free meals, we not only save the cost of purchasing the meals, we also save the cost of employing the people serving the meals, and we can use the cafeteria space for other activities.” That would have been merely cold-hearted. Read.
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cracked
My feet are cracking really badly. I get deep cracks in the calluses that build up around the heels of both feet and on the very thick callus I get on the outside of my right big toe. The left big toe gets callused, too, but it’s not as thick and rarely cracks. Not yet. Read.
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why a Dutchman
When I was just a wee lad and I did something I shouldn’t have done, my grandmother Cleo would scold me by saying something that sounded like, “Nix kommer rouse in the Dutchman’s house!” My mother and my uncle confirm that she said the same to them, and that the meaning was clearly, “don’t do Read.
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extra hour
Woke up early, tossed and turned, heard the clock strike four, gave in to the reality that I wasn’t going back to sleep. While I was getting dressed, noticed my phone said the time was a little after five o’clock, which made me feel a little better. I don’t know why I feel bad about Read.
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weed man
I got a visit from the Weed Man today. He wasn’t selling weed. That would have been something I’d have considered buying. He was selling lawn care. In January. As in, the first week in January, while our yard was covered in a couple inches of snow, we got a knock on the door from Read.
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closing the loophole
Here’s the Terminator movie I’d like to see: The first terminator travels back in time from 2029 to 1984, hunts down all the Sarah Connors in the phone book until he finds the right one, but gets killed because Reese, a soldier from the future, also travels back in time to help Connor defeat the Read.
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blinded by the light
Blinded by the light Wreck up like a douche under a roamer in the night Blinded by the light Wrap up light a toots until a roper in a nine Blinded by the light Whack out liner doofs on turner owner inner knife Blinded by the light What pup lacks a doots on dare dough Read.
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absolute and total drivel
As I type these words, it’s seven o’clock in the morning and the sun still hasn’t risen. I asked the internet when the sun will rise and it told me 7:14 am. Then I looked out the window into utter and complete darkness and looked back at the internet. Refreshed the page. It still told Read.
