This Is Drivel

Category: yet another rant

  • interminable

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    And now, a summary of every news bulletin, editorial and talking pundit I’ve heard on the radio this week: Monday: Caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus caucus. Tuesday: Read.

  • don’t

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    A few words about shellac, in case you think you might ever use it to finish and unfinished item of furniture: Don’t do it. But, if you do, don’t underestimate its power to frustrate you. First of all, it takes forever to dry. The label on the can says you should wait an hour for Read.

  • faster

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    While I was driving around all weekend I listened to more pop music on the radio that I usually do in a whole month. A whole lot more. So much that I exceeded all my quotas and won’t have to listen to pop music again for at least a year, thank goodness. I think I Read.

  • kablammy

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    When I read a headline like “U.S. Warns Of Terrorist Bombs Implanted In Humans,” I have to stop whatever I’m doing and read the story. Because, you know, bombs. In people. Wow. Short version of the story: Bombs-in-the body is not a brand new idea, but recent intelligence indicates a fresh interest in using this Read.

  • old man smell

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    I’ve recently become afflicted with old man smell. I’m going to assume you know what I mean by that and just plow ahead with my story. This is going to get pretty gross, so what I’m going to do is babble for a little bit here about how gross it’s going to get so you Read.

  • bang

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    We finally have a law allowing everyone in Wisconsin to stuff handguns down their pants if they want to. This is so very important that the fine people of our state legislature passed this law before they passed a budget. And of course the law comes with the usual restrictions: You can’t take a gun Read.

  • ouch

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    This literally makes my head hurt: Congressman Dana Rohrabacher, listening to testimony regarding man-made climate change, asked a witness if any thought were being given “to subsidizing the clearing of rain forests in order for some countries to eliminate that production of greenhouse gases?” Ouch. Really? Ouch. Yes, really. Ouch. Leaving aside the question of Read.

  • twilight

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    I just heard a right-winger and a left-winger on a morning talk show debating the latest political circus acts here in the great state of Wisconsin, the most recent being the enactment of a law requiring citizens to present two forms of photo identification in order to vote, but touching on other topics such as Read.

  • consider

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    Nathan Bootz, Superintendent of Ithaca Public Schools, in an open letter to Michigan Governor Rick Snyder in the Gratiot County Herald Consider the life of a Michigan prisoner. They get three square meals a day. Access to free health care. Internet. Cable television. Access to a library. A weight room. Computer lab. They can earn Read.

  • dusted

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    Last night, just before we went to bed, My Darling B assured me that we wouldn’t have to worry this year about an aerial assault of our fair city by squadrons of cropdusters spraying yellow shit (otherwise known under the trade name Killer Yellow Shit) to poison all the gypsy moths who so sneakily hide Read.

photo of the author and the author's best friend