Category: random idiocy
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shoes
When I retired from the military and went on the job hunt, I was offered a job at a bank and took it, thinking it would be pretty financially secure because, you know, that’s where the money’s at. In banks. Or maybe not. And when we went shopping for cars, I was dead set on… Read.
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pensive
Our dish washer’s broke, so we had to call Sears to get a technician out here to look at it and it’s one of those service calls they can’t give you an exact time for because timetables embolden the terrorists and endanger national security. So I took the day off from work to sit in… Read.
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itchin
A gaggle of gun-totin’ self-defenders gathered at a Starbuck’s in Sussex yesterday to pick up some java before demonstrating at the headquarters of the State Patrol. Starbucks corporate policy allows people to pack heat in their stores if state law allows it. I love the quote from Krysta Sutterfield, one of the protesters, who generalized… Read.
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flying hotcakes
Tonight’s talk radio was full of metaphors. Bad ones. Really bad ones. It started off with a discussion on the war in Afghanistan, Pakistan, Waziristan and all those other stans. There were quite a few bad actors on that stage, one of the listeners called in to say, and another one called in to venture… Read.
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bumper cars go bump
Here’s something that’ll keep My Darling B awake all night: STREET LEGAL BUMPER CARS! More street-legal bumper cars at CoolThings.com and this Flickr page. Read.
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Ahhh
Ah, Saturday morning: When I can wake up at a reasonable hour, when I can lay in bed for a while after I wake up, when I can sit on the sofa with my morning coffee until I decide I’m ready to start the day. And even then, “start the day” means take a long,… Read.
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AARP wannabe
AARP sends me an invitation to join their club about once a month and, to show they really mean it, they enclose a thick, plastic – but fake – AARP membership card. Some day I’ll stop shredding these things, but today, it’s confetti. I think because I’m officially retired from the Air Force, the Aid… Read.
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stalking
Notice anything missing? I didn’t, until I got to work yesterday. It was like that dream where you’re in a big crowd of people and you suddenly realize you’re wearing nothing but underwear. My coworkers were very understanding about it. All day long as I padded around the office I expected somebody to say something… Read.
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bauble
It is an ashtray, but I haven’t taken up smoking. It’s an ashtray exactly like one my parents had for years and years. For all I know, Mom might still have it. Or, this might be that very ashtray. I was wandering the aisles of Saint Vincent de Paul’s thrift store on Willy Street when… Read.
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monster
Here’s a photo for my Mom, who’s a little worried about me using a table saw. See that gadget in the middle of the board? That’s actually three separate gadgets, two of them made out of cold steel, that have the sole function of keeping my fingers away from the blade. I’m not saying it’s… Read.
