Category: random idiocy
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toboggan
For a couple years, my family lived in Marquette, in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. It snows there fourteen months out of the year, so everybody knew how to catch fish by cutting a hole in the ice, and every family owned at least one toboggan. I just love that word. I could say it… Read.
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kid world
The Toyota garage we take our car to for service appears to be staffed entirely by children. The guy who acted like he was in charge had to be in his early to mid twenties. If I had to guess based on the context, I’d peg him at twenty-four. If I had to guess after… Read.
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Fritos
All I needed was eight bags of Fritos, the snack-size bags that you can grab off the shelf at the gas station. I thought I could get them at the local Copps store down the corner because it’s just down the road and, well, because it’s a grocery store. Seemed like a no-brainer. But no… Read.
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handerpants
Um … Damn. Wish I’d thought of that. Read.
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a visit from the axe murderer
We had a visit from the axe murderer the other night. We were both very sure he was there. He creeps into our house every so often with his double-bladed war axe that drips with the blood of his victims, at least one of which he killed just minutes before he broke into our little… Read.
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godzilla bless autofill
The Seanster and I were exchanging giddy text messages about the latest movie teaser for the upcoming Godzilla movie. Turns out my phone not only knows how to spell “Godzilla” already, it autofills “Godzilla” after I type the first three letters, because obviously who would ever stop after typing just “God?” Read.
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eat me
If I never see this advertisement again, that’ll be just fine with me. It seems to pop up on every single web site I’ve visited recently, as if I’ve been Googling “gobs of blood-encrusted snot I’d like to swallow.” There’s a part of me that would like to know what the connection is between high… Read.
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Inner Me
I’m still feeling full after eating out every night but one last week and then getting a belly full of beer at the anniversary party they threw at Central Waters Brewing on Saturday, so I wasn’t going to eat breakfast. Then I thought, You know, if you don’t eat breakfast, you’ll make it to about… Read.
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say cheese!
Remember photo booths? For a buck and a half’s worth of quarters, you could get a snot-covered film strip of photos of all the people you went out drinking with. For me, they were a lot of fun because every strip was a collection of four completely random shots taken at the most awkward moments,… Read.
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rosemary time
Anybody know what the trick to keeping a rosemary plant alive is? If you do, you’d better tell us because we’ve killed every single rosemary plant we’ve ever brought into this house and it’s just going to keep on happening unless something or someone breaks the cycle. That’s right, every single one. I admit, some… Read.
This Is Drivel 