Tuesday, April 19th, 2011

I opened the door for one of the women who works in the office down the hall, not to be chivalrous, but because she’d forgotten her card key. For reasons that have yet to become clear to me, all the doors in our office building are locked, and the locks can be opened only by waving a card past the glaring red eye that stares out from the brown plastic pad beside the knob of each door.

It wasn’t the first time I’d opened the door for her. Just last week I found her waiting outside the same door for someone to come along and let her in. She got locked out both times when she got up from her desk to visit the bathroom, forgetting her card at her desk. I know this because as I leaned over to unlock the door I said something witty like, “Lock yourself out again?”

She was nice enough to chuckle at my inane comment, even nicer for telling me how she got locked out, then added: “I just want it implanted in my butt, like my cat.”

The image of everyone at the office waving their butts at the doors to open them stayed with me the rest of the day.

Locked Out | 8:05 pm CDT
Category: daily drivel | Tags: ,
4 Comments | Add a comment


  1. 1 B said at 9:34 pm on April 19th, 2011:

    Waving one’s butt at the door to enter is SOP for the DOT.
    No, seriously.

  2. 2 Jesse said at 9:22 am on April 20th, 2011:

    It took me a minute to figure out what she meant. I couldn’t figure out what she meant by having her cat implanted in her butt.

  3. 3 Dave said at 6:58 am on April 21st, 2011:

    Wait. I thought that’s what she meant. You mean…?

  4. 4 The Seanster said at 10:14 pm on April 20th, 2011:

    “Waving one’s butt at the door to enter is SOP for the DOT.”