Category: daily drivel
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Thank you, Phil Thien
I spent the afternoon working on dust collection because I like to play with my power tools in the basement and power tools make a lot of dust, which gets everywhere. In fact, Our Humble O’Bode may be as dusty as it is, and it is nothing if not very dusty, because I play with… Read.
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quantum
Neil deGrasse Tyson gets all worked up about why the study of quantum mechanics matters: In the 1920s, quantum physics was discovered. That is the science of the small: the science of electrons, protons, neutrons, particles, nuclei. At the time, you’d say, This is just physicists burning tax money. Who cares about the atom? I… Read.
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huff
I love Sunday mornings. The cats are curled up in their beds. My Darling B is sorting through her herbs and spices, trying to decide how she will magically combine them to create a delicious dinner. And I am in the basement huffing paint fumes. Minwax stain sealer, actually. I’m putting up a couple of… Read.
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snowfall
Ah, yes. Shoveling snow off the driveway. The wintery exercise that blows the flabby coronary muscles of dozens of aging, out-of-shape Wisconsin men every year. Will this year be my turn? After I “retired” from the Air Force, I moved back to Wisconsin because I remembered liking four seasons, and after living in so many… Read.
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stealing
Your cat doesn’t love you, and I can prove it. “Oh, yes he does,” you protest. “He’ll sit in my lap and purr for as long as I keep petting him.” Tell you what: Go out to your favorite local pet store and buy a heated cat bed for your cat, then get back to… Read.
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brush
Here’s a little FYI for you: If you keep your can of mineral spirits right next to your can of denatured alcohol, be careful not to confuse the one with the other, because mineral spirits makes a terrible martini. Just kidding. You shouldn’t mix mineral spirits with vermouth, you should only serve it neat on… Read.
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shrimp
I got shrimp for my birthday dinner. It’s practically a tradition by this time, all because of the Great Shrimp Dinner Blurt of ’94. I came home from work. My Darling B was in the kitchen, preparing a special dinner for my birthday. “Don’t come in!” she warned, or I would ruin the surprise. Oh,… Read.
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pecker
I don’t suppose you know how to trap and/or kill a goddamn woodpecker, do you? At least one of the little bastards has pecked two holes clear through the cedar siding of Our Humble O’Bode. I will do anything short of selling my redundant internal organs to stop it. There’s a hole on the north… Read.
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sleepy
In case you were wondering, we didn’t have to send the cats away to uncle Joe’s farm so we could get a good night’s sleep. It turned out to be stupidly easy to get them to stop climbing all over us all through the night. They only do that in the winter, so it followed… Read.
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catty
The cats will have to go. I need a full night’s sleep, but ever since night time temperatures plunged below freezing, I’ve had to wake up several times through the night to kick my way out from underneath a pile of cats. This does not make for a restful night. You might think that two… Read.
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