Category: daily drivel
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sleeper
We bought a sofa sleeper yesterday evening from a salesperson who wouldn’t take “yes” for an answer. We already knew what we wanted because we’d stopped by the same store the day before, talked to a different salesperson, looked at catalogs, sat on a couple of display models, then went home and, after measuring the… Read.
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Mighty Mouse
Who hasn’t needed this guy to save the day at least once in their lives? Read.
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Plexi
If you read nothing else today, you should devote fifteen minutes to Eyeball of Providence unless, providentially, you have an appointment tomorrow with a doctor who will slice your eyeballs open and you’re feeling at all anxious about it. … if you have to have cataract surgery and have not seen “Un Chien Andalou,” the… Read.
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what’s that smell?
With about fifteen minutes between chores this morning, I started folding clothes from a basket that’s been sitting on the floor in our bedroom all week, a common-enough sight in our house. We can wash clothes like the pros, we’re just not so good at folding them or putting them away. Sometimes we go a… Read.
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paula dean
I’m beginning to despair that I will never be able to read the news again without having to look at Paula Deen’s freakishly bright smile hovering over some story about how she lost yet another endorsement or book deal. It’s only been going on for, what, a week? Feels like ETERNITY. Our language needs a… Read.
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Monstrous Red Rain
In every movie I’ve ever seen about the war in Viet Nam, there’s always one scene where it’s raining like it’s never going to stop raining. That’s how it’s raining here today. If a visitor from another planet landed in my backyard today, he would nickname this planet Rain. Read.
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monstrous red blob
Not biking to work today. Woke up to thunder and was greeted by spotty rain drizzling down when I opened the front door to let the chipmunks tease the cats. And there was also a monstrous red blob coming in from the west on the satellite map when I checked the National Weather Service. I… Read.
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midnight snack
I’m gonna go to bed now, and any cats who wake me up at three in the morning, I’m gonna eat em. I’m not even gonna stop to skin em. Just eat em like apples. Read.
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under effen wear
He was wearing jeans that were pulled all the way up to his waist and properly belted so there was no chance they were going to sag, ever. And over the jeans he wore triple-XL plaid boxer shorts. Oh yes. It can always get worse. Read.
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rooty toot toot
My Darling B has discovered an amazing product: a non-dairy ice cream that makes me fart more than real dairy does. In fact, my gut may have turned last night’s approximately 8-ounce serving completely into more gas than one human being would ever produce in a 24-hour period under normal conditions. Or even under abnormal… Read.
This Is Drivel 