I have blown so much snot out of my head in the last twenty-four hours that it should have collapsed by now. Or imploded, maybe. It sort of feels like it imploded, but when I look in the mirror it looks mostly normal, except for the dark rings around my eyes and the sore redness of my nose. And all the snot. That much snot should not come out of one head, not even in a week.

I caught a bug somewhere between here and Rice Lake while I was on a business trip. I thought it was just the sniffles until yesterday when I used up half a roll of toilet paper blowing my nose. Then it woke me up in the middle of the night by punching me right in the sinuses. This morning my throat feels like I’ve been trying to swallow a cheese grater.

So I’m staying home today to make use of the awesome recuperative powers of a cuddly cat and umpty-leven cups of hot tea. I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me.