We ain’t doin’ nothin’ today. All the stuff we had to do, we did yesterday, and then some. I cleaned and dusted all the books in a 6-foot-tall book case. Tell me that isn’t going above and beyond. Go ahead, just try to tell me that, because lah-lah-lah, I can’t hear you!

I dusted more than I did just about anything else. There is more friggin’ dust in our little red house than there ever was in all the dust storms that raged across the whole state of Kansas back in the 1920’s, or whenever that Dust Bowl thing happened. You’d think I’d be able to remember. I’ve read a few books about it, but my memory’s fried. That’s why I keep the books. We’ve got book shelves six feet high in every room in the house, and I cleaned out the one that’s in our bedroom. Took a couple hours because I unshelved all three or four hundred books, vacuumed the thick layer of dust off the tops of them, vacuumed the thick layer of dust off the shelves (just how the hell does dust get under the books?), wiped down each shelf with a thick rag soaked in furniture polish, and finally reshelved all three or four hundred books. Oh, and I repaired a shelf that was broken. Couple of the little pegs pulled loose and got lost somewhere in the books and dust. I replaced them with a couple from the hoard I have in my basement lair. Good thing I never throw any of the little pegs away.

One down, I-don’t-know-how-many to go. I’ll do the book case in the living room next weekend. That’s all I’m focusing on for now. Baby steps, right?

The desk got a right and proper dusting, too, because damn! There’s a lot of dust in our house, in case I hadn’t mentioned it. Particularly in our bedroom, for reasons that science may never be able to explain. Before I started on the book case I noticed a thin layer of dust on everything on top of the desk, including the mail we brought in during the week. That kind of pissed me off. I’d just cleaned and dusted that desk a week or two ago and there it was all dirty again. Figuring I could spare fifteen or twenty minutes clearing off the stuff and giving it another dusting, I set to work. Fifteen minutes later, I finished opening the mail, shredding what we didn’t need and throwing away the rest. Twenty minutes later I was just finishing up dusting the sides and top when I noticed the cobwebs and dust behind the desk. I pulled it away from the wall and started working behind it. Forty-five minutes later I was on my hands and knees scrubbing up the last of the dust and cat spit before laying down a coat of Minwax. There’ s almost as much cat spit on our floors as there is dust. Bonkers is getting drooly in his old age.

An hour later I was pushing the desk back in place after wiping it down one last time, and that, boys and girls, is the story of how I got distracted when I went into the bedroom to dust the books.