Holy freezing shit! It was eight degrees when we got in the car tonight, a temperature so cold that whoever named it made sure it had just one syllable so they wouldn’t have to suck in any air while saying it. The only way you could come up with a better name for temperatures this cold would be to use lots of cuss words with multiple plosives and fricatives in them. If you’re smiling right now, you not only know the words I’m thinking of, it’s also very probable that you’ve shouted a few of them while stamping your feet and slapping your hands together while trying to stay warm.

I don’t like being cold. This might seem to be an odd characteristic for a guy from Wisconsin but honestly, I’ve always been a lightweight when it comes to cold weather. Can’t stand it. Have to dress up in half a dozen layers of underwear and overwear to venture out on any day in February. I sleep swaddled in no less than two quilts and a blanket, unless a down comforter is close at hand. If I could burn all the fuel I wanted to stay warm, my carbon footprint would be twice the size of Kalamazoo, Michigan. I am a winter wimp.