There was another one of those stories on the radio yesterday morning about people who retire, then start a new career because they don’t know what to do with themselves. The guest speaker was one of those people who said she couldn’t imagine herself doing nothing all day. What is with these people? Have they never had any time to themselves? And if they can’t chill, why can’t they just keep their mouths shut about it? Or, tell you what: One of them can come do my job, and I’ll retire for them.

The story came on just as My Darling B came into the kitchen to pour herself a cup of coffee. She listened to only ten seconds or so of the program before she rolled her eyes. “Ooo, I got sooo bored, golfing every day! And I could only read so many books! I need a career that fulfills me!” she said. “What a whiner! Why did you start another career after retiring, dear?”

“Because I had a mortgage.” I thought for another moment, then added: “And I couldn’t figure out how to make money drinking coffee and reading books all day.” Which sucks because apparently some people have figured out how to do that for a living. Dammit.