“Did you know there’s a Pac Man in your ear?” My Darling B asked me the other day.

I laughed at her because I thought I heard her say, “Did you know there’s a Pac Man in your ear?” But then I looked at her and saw she had her finger stuck in her ear, so I heard at least the part about the ear right, which meant that possibly I heard the part about Pac Man right, too.

“Stick your finger in your ear and wiggle it,” she said, laughing.

Hoo-kay, she’s finally lost all her marbles, I thought to myself, and did as she commanded, trying not to make any sudden moves and wondering how quickly I could stop the car and get out, because we were driving down the road at the time.

But no, it turned out that she was just trying to show me some goofy thing she learned at the office from one of her coworkers. When I wiggled my finger I was supposed to hear the wakka-wakka-wakka sound that Pac Man makes, but either my ears aren’t built the way hers are or I wasn’t doing it right, because all I heard was a sound like squishing a wet dish rag, even when she stuck her finger in my ear and did it. [Kids: Do not try this! We’re adults and … well, we’re adults! Sorta.]

“Who showed you that?” I asked B, and she told me the name of a coworker who’s always telling her goofy jokes and texting her cell phone. “We gotta go out drinking with her,” I said. Maybe after a couple of martinis we could get the Pac Man thing to work. Or bust our eardrums.