Saturday, December 18th, 2010

One of the Christmas gifts I bought for My Darling B on-line arrived in the mail yesterday, a t-shirt with an adorable kitty on it. I’m giving away the surprise because I’ve already showed it to her. I had to. When I opened the package I found out there was no way I’d be able to sit by with a straight face while she opened it on Christmas morning. Why? Oh, so glad you asked.

By the way, there’s a growing belief that more people are now using the internet to look at kittens than porn. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if that were somehow proven to be true. When there are web sites like Cute Overload and LOLCats, I don’t even wonder why it could be true.

I ordered a t-shirt for myself, too, and they both came wrapped up in the same package, so I took it down to my basement lair to separate them and stash her present away in a hidey hole. But first, I had to get a good look at it.

Mine was just fine. I ordered a medium for myself and it was more than big enough. I used to order large back when large was just about my size, but lately large has expanded along with the rest of the universe so much that a large is now big enough for two of me to slither inside. Either that, or I am gradually wasting away to nothing. I can accept that either is possible, as long as I can still get clothes in my size.

I draped my t-shirt across the back of my chair and unfolded the shirt I got for B, and that’s when I discovered I’d fallen victim to the paradox of clothing sizes. While a men’s medium has gotten larger over the years, ladies’ sizes have gotten smaller. How does that make any sense? Her medium was so much smaller than my medium that I can only conclude “ladies” has become a euphemism for women the size and shape of eight-year-old girls.

I was so startled by this, I took it straight upstairs and showed it to B, who wasn’t surprised at all. I think she even anticipated that I was going to show her a t-shirt that she wouldn’t have been able to pull over her head, thanks to my misunderstanding of women’s shirt sizes.

I’ll just buy men’s t-shirts for her from now on. At least I have some idea how big they are.

Hello Kitty! | 4:11 pm CST
Category: daily drivel | Tags: ,
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