Sunday, May 20th, 2012

It’s four-thirty in the morning. I’ve been lying awake since three. Guess I might as well get out of bed and make some coffee.

We went to bed last night after running the air conditioning in the evening to cool off the house. The mid-day temperature hit eighty-eight and humidity was sauna-like, making it impossible to feel comfortable indoors unless we were in the basement, lying flat against the concrete floor, so B switched on the central air about an hour before dinner and left it on until bed time. When I hit the hay at around eleven last night, the house was still cool.

I couldn’t figure out at first why I woke up at three. The cats weren’t fighting. I didn’t have to take a leak. But as I slowly came fully awake, I realized I was hot as a tinfoil-wrapped potato on a Weber grill. I clawed my way out from under the covers, but it didn’t help. The air in the room was absolutely stifling. Laying on top of the sheets in nothing but my skivvies, I was still burning up.

I rolled out of bed and checked the window: closed. Tried to jerk it open, had to unlock it first. Most nights, we sleep with the windows open, but when B closes a window she locks it to keep the axe murderers out. I had to unlock every window as I went around the house, trying to get some fresh air. Then, before I climbed back into bed, I switched on the ceiling fan.

Didn’t help. I was nice and cool, but I was wide-awake after all that roaming around, and I never did get back to sleep. I must have dozed off once or twice, because I never heard the clock in the living room chime four bells, although I did hear the half-hour bell at three-thirty and four-thirty. And a couple times I slipped far enough into sleep to swallow my tongue and snort myself awake.

But as the night dragged on to morning and I could hear the birds begin their morning songs through the now-open window, the idea of getting up to make coffee sounded better and better. And here I am. Hiya.

ADDED LATER: B correctly points out that, when closing the windows, the top sash often drops open. When that happens, the locks on the windows don’t work, so when she closes the windows she also locks them to make sure both the top and bottom sashes are closed tightly. She’s just making sure we’re not sending our air conditioning out the window, not trying to lock out the axe murderers. So noted.

insomnolence | 5:18 am CST
Category: daily drivel | Tags:
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